mercredi 14 novembre 2007

4. The Itchy & Scratchy Show

Meet Quasimodo the Mutant Tomato: bright red skin, swollen eyes, rashes all over my face, neck and arms (and don't get me started on my ears). No idea what the matter is, but it ITCHES like hell since yesterday; it's like having rabid ants under my skin -- and they're mating!

My collarbone feels like someone's been at it with a scouring pad, I have scratches on my arms and legs (possibly this is a strong indication that I should start filing my nails), I'm starting to envy cats who can rub themselves all over the carpet, my neck is burned raw and my cheeks feel like those of a hamster munching on red coals.

And then my horoscope this morning: "you'll be litterally aglow with positive energy".

Is this the stars' idea of a joke?

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